8 pounds!

I've worked hard to keep myself in shape (and no, not round though I agree that is indeed a shape, just not one I'd like to be). I've spent countless hours in the gym and deprived myself of thousands of delicious calories. It sucks. Sucks with a capital Su. I'm actually thinner and in much better shape than I was in the picture that's just to the right here (she has chubby arms). In the past 2 1/2 months I've fallen off the workout wagon. I got sick a couple of times and just couldn't get back into the whole gym dedication thing again. Also, my aunt sent me about a pound of the most deliciously evil fudge you could ever imagine. She manages to take the recipe that's on the back of every jar of marshmallow fluff and turn it into something that would make the angels weep if they tasted it. I don't know how she does it, but I'm sure there must be some black magic or soul selling involved. Evil. Eeeeevvvvviiiiilllllll.

So, thanks to the evil fudge followed quickly by Halloween and all that left over candy and a lack of hitting the gym, I have somehow managed to gain 8 pounds. 8 pounds! Holy crap! Not being a large woman, 8 pounds is a lot on my frame. Most people can't tell, but believe me, my jeans were letting me know the other morning when I tried to stuff my extra 8 pounds into them. My thighs (where my weight likes to hang out cause that's the place to be apparently) looked like fat little sausages encased in Michael Kors denim and there was enough muffin top to start a bakery. How could I let this happen? How?????? And why does it happen? I mean, once you've worked your ass off (literally) getting in shape, you should stay that way. Period. There should be no silly upkeep. Any fat that you take in should just know that you've been working out and will get burned off anyway and just flush out of your system without spending time attached to your thighs, no matter how tempting they might look and how much fun the fat heard your thighs were.

This morning I schlepped myself to the gym and spent more than an hour on the elliptical and the treadmill trying to make the 8 pounds magically disappear (sadly that did not happen-imagine that) and cursing that ooey-gooey delicious fudge. Damn that woman, anyway. Sadly, I'll be at the gym again tomorrow and probably every week day that I can fit it in, bitching and moaning about how unfair it is that foods that taste so good are sooooo very, very bad for you and how sitting on the sofa most of the day does not lead to toned thighs. Unfair! Unfair I say!